Identity Week Recap

Life has been so fun & such an incredible adventure lately. The Lord is continuously showing me more of His heart & who He has called me to be. The topic of last week’s lectures was identity. God really did a mighty work in my life & brought so much clarity to who I am. Every morning I go on a run and then sit on a sea wall and pray as I look at the ocean. I sat there, and I asked God who I am and how He sees me. He told me I’m like the wall that I was sitting on at the time. Honestly, I was expecting God to be like, “you’re a flower, sunshine, a mighty river” something, anything, but a wall? I was so confused. Later that day I went to ministry night. I walked outside of Ohana court to pray, praise Jesus, and watch the sunset. In that moment I asked Jesus to take me deeper into His love and intimacy with Him. If His love is the ocean then I want to dive in deeper and experience the depths and the riches of His immeasurable love. When I walked back into Ohana Court the speaker came up to the mic and literally said, “I feel like people are on a wall and need to make the decision to go deeper.” WOAH!!!!!!! At that moment I got on my knees and I surrendered everything to Jesus. I don’t want to be on the wall in between whole hearted pursuit and surrender versus the labels placed on me from this overly hurried & busy world. I envisioned the ocean roaring and breaking down the wall that stood for so long in my life. Surrender is the most freeing feeling. I think it’s crazy that when we lay down everything and are left with nothing, we actually find everything in Christ. So counter cultural. What is crazy is that my name, Bailey, means the outer WALL of a castle. I realized in that moment that I wanted to surrender Bailey in a sense. Whoever the world told me I am and the labels placed upon my life, I wanted to drop them all at the foot of the cross. It doesn't matter who I am or what I do, I simply want my life to be a broken vessel that is advancing the Kingdom. A broken jar of clay that contains a great treasure & is filled up so it can constantly be poured out. Nothing I have accomplished matters, the only thing that matters is what Jesus thinks of me. My identity belongs to Him. I surrender who I am for who He is. I don’t want this feeling based, changing emotions, labeled, fearful, value seeking, worldly girl to be my identity. I want who God says I am to be the entirety of my identity. The fact that I am loved, chosen, valued, worthy, enough, bought with a price, set apart, redeemed, made pure, refined, and so much more. I want to rid myself of me so I can gain more of who He is. Align my heart with the desires of His heart. Less of me, more of Him. There is so much more to discover. It is so beautiful that as we seek Him more we find out more of who we are in the process because we belong fully to Him. Thank you Jesus that we find our belonging in your presence. I love you Jesus. I am yours & you are mine forevermore.

Song of Solomon 2:16, “My beloved is mine, and I am his; he grazes among the lilies.”